Saturday, June 28, 2008

I am getting married!

I am getting married. I have never been married. I am 38 years old and have no children. It is an interesting thought. I have attended maybe 30 weddings in my life. I would say 23 of them ended in divorce. I have lost contact with 5 couples however. In my observation, weddings are so depressing. For one, they are stressful. I don't like stress, avoid at all possible. They are wasteful. The trash produced is phenomenal. I worked for a catering company that hosted such events as well. Think of all the invitations that are sent to announce showers, formal dinners, the wedding itself. Way too much work and stress for a one day event.

So, I have decided not to have a traditional wedding. I really don't like that much directed attention. However, I will send an earth friendly announcement that has wildflower seeds embedded in the invitation to a few selected people. The others are getting emails. The message might read something like this.

"Married. Party at the Point. Bring your own canoe, tent and toilet paper. Save your gift. Plant this invitation instead."

I am not a religious person. We both aren't to the shame of our families. To think some stranger appointed by God will stand and witness and pronounce us something we have been since we agreed on a commitment from one another.

I am planning for August 8, 2008. Infinity. I only work a half day that Friday. Meet at the Court House and then go to the Dairy Queen for a Tropical blizzard. Or is it Hawaiian? Damn it. Which one has the pineapples?